saturni_stellis | Chocolate Box 2021 Letter!

Hello creator! Thank you for picking me up and deciding to write me something for this exchange. I’m very excited to see what you will come up with :) Please see my likes and DNW’s below, and some prompts for each of my requests which you are free to ignore/include as you wish!

DNWs: Genderswaps, Crossovers, Character death (if not in the canon), Pregnancy/M-Preg, Scat, Tentacles, Fisting, First-person & second-person POV, unrequested ships, Setting change AU's (coffee shop/high school au etc)

General Likes: fluff, slice of life, crack treated seriously, canon-typical humour, uniform kink, clothing porn, size difference, first-times, UST, resolved sexual tension, five-times fics, mutual pining, un-requited love turns out to be requited, angst, soft touches, touch-starved, dirty talk, bickering, in-character banter, smut, hurt/comfort, cuddling, hand holding during sex, guilt-ridden characters, guilt over sexual desires, jealousy, finger sucking.

Monty Python’s Flying Circus

Mr Neutron/Mrs S-C-U-M

I would love to read anything about these two; from Gen all the way through to and including Explicit! I just think they’re absolutely adorable and hilarious, and Mr N is obviously a little sweetie who’s just a big mushy lover boy at heart. I’d be interested in how they get off Earth together in the nick of time; where they go first - does he take her straight to his planet or do they have a rendezvous somewhere in space? Do they go for a holiday in Benidorm? Does Mrs S mother him and tell him not to eat too much ice cream? Anything where she’s a bit bossy with him would be lovely. If you want to play around with the fact that Mrs S -C-U-M is played by a guy, but is living life as a woman then please feel free. Mr N has all sorts of powers so what does he do with them when they’re together?

Professor Sir Sir Adrian Furrows/Raymond Luxury-Yacht

“He asked me, he asked me!” How long has Raymond been waiting for Sir Sir Adrian to ask him out on that camping holiday? What happens when they get there? Are they already boyfriends or is one of them waiting for the other to ask first? Why does Raymond wear that ridiculous fake nose? Is it just to get Adrian’s attention? Again, anything from Gen through to the Explicit for these guys would just be fantastic.

Mr Gulliver/Mr Pither

I just adore the Cycling Tour episode so much, Mr Pither is SO adorable and I love that he finds Mr Gulliver to accompany him on his travels (even if he does lose his mind for the most of it). Do they have more adventures together? Do they grow close throughout their perilous journeys? Does Mr Gulliver know how to even ride a bike and if he doesn’t does Mr Pither teach him? Anything fluffy or stupidly sweet between these two would be great, especially if it resulted in some classic “holidaying” tropes like; there was only one bed, huddling together for warmth whilst camping, ow i’m injured please feed me - type of thing.

Cardinal Biggles & Cardinal Fang & Cardinal Ximénez

These Spanish cardinals are great and so wonderfully pathetic. Why do they still have such an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope? How do they know when people are about to say they didn’t expect the Spanish Inquisition and what do they get up to at home when they’re not running all over the country trying to burst in (unexpected). Do they actually have anything to do with the church or are they just three guys that got together because they liked dressing up as Spanish Inquisitors? How did they get together!? Any backstory or cracky sort of fic about these three is welcome!

Monty Python’s Meaning of Life

Boarding School Teacher/Carter

Any excuse to have teacher!John punishing student!Michael could not be passed up in my book. I also have no shame, so when it comes to student/teacher, age difference or humiliation kink - I’m there. Give me an alternate scene where teacher!John gets Carter to come up in front of the class and demonstrates sex-ed on him instead. Does he give Carter detention for playing with his ocarina in class? What happens during this detention? Does Carter have to put into practise what he learnt during Sex-Ed? Anything goes with these two, and I really do mean anything.

Angela & Debbie & Geoffrey & Grim Reaper & Howard & The Portland-Smythes

The grim reaper bit is my favourite scene in the Meaning of Life and perhaps my favourite moment from all the Python movies. It taps into my Halloween-y heart, that nice mix between spooky and comic relief. I wonder if Angela (Eric Idle) poisoned her friends with the salmon mousse on purpose? Did she have an ulterior motive to using tinned salmon? And if so…why!? How did Debbie die seeing as she exclaims that she “didn’t even eat the mousse!?” as they’re being led out of the cottage by Death. Any kind of extended scene/missing scene or backstory fic would be so fun for this bunch. Or anything about them arriving in Heaven!

Gaston & Maître D & Mr Creosote

I’ve always felt that there was some sneaky plan going on behind the ‘wafer thin mint’ moment offered up by Maitre D at the end of the Mr Creosote scene. He seems very adamant that he eats it, and knows to get the hell out of the way when he does! What drove him to murder!? Had they just had enough of Mr Creosote (and who can blame them!?). Did him and Gaston hatch a plan to get rid of him once and for all. I honestly think Eric has never looked quite as attractive as he does as Gaston, so if you want to include anything that hints at him and Maitre D being ‘more than colleagues/friends’ that’s totally fine with me! I’d just love any additional scenes/backstory with Mr Creosote constantly being a disgusting pain in the ass, and the two french waiters coming to the end of their tether with him.

Monty Python’s Life of Brian

First Centurion/Pontius Pilate

So I’m basically 100% here for a big buff Roman centurion to have his way with his smol bottom of a Governer. I like the idea of Pilate sometimes turning to the First Centurion for any kind of advice or guidance with governing his unruly subjects. Pilate having an obvious soft spot for his First Centurion - public displays of affection/favouritism etc… how do the other Centurions react to this? Any kind of angst is welcome, as is anything explicit; especially if it involves First Centurion teaching his superior some “things” about what it’s really like to be rough in the sack (and Pilate being more than willing). If you want to age-down Pilate, that is also totally fine by me (especially if it means there’s a bit of an age gap with Centurion!John being quite a bit older). Is Pilate enamoured with his wough tough Centuwion!? Does he ask him to regale him with stories about battlefields between the sheets?

Monty Python’s Holy Grail

Lancelot du Lac/Prince Herbert

I really feel like the Pythons missed a trick here with the Lancelot and Prince Herbert storyline. Where’s my happy ending where Lancelot rescues poor pathetic little Herbert from his horrible abusive father!? Where’s Lancelot carrying little Herbert out of the Castle window and off into the sunset!? Where’s their secret wedding, followed by the consummation of their marriage next to a beautiful lake!? Anyway, you get the picture. Any kind of fix-it fic, missing scene would be so fun, where Lancelot goes back for Herbert, or actually takes him away. Herbert cooing over his knight in shining armour (literally). Lancelot telling him about the Holy Grail and Herbert being amazed by his bravery and adventures. Just yeah, anything with these two basically.

Monty Python RPF

John Cleese/Michael Palin

Where my fellow John/Mike shippers at?! These guys practically write themselves. They so obviously have something deeper than friendship going on, especially on John’s part anyway. I would read anything about these two tbh, they’re probably my Monty OTP, seeing as I pretty much shipped them before I even watched all of Flying Circus or really got into Python at all! Anything that involves lots of pining, UST, banter, would just be fab, and if you want to include any/all of the other Pythons that’s also absolutely fine! Especially if some, or all of them are just like, for god sake will you guys just fuck already!? I love the idea of John actually being horrendously shy about doing anything with Mikey for fear it might ruin their friendship, but also suffering deeply because he so desperately wants to! Anything from a slow-burn to simple PWP would be completely wonderful.

John Cleese/Terry Jones

This one is a relatively new venture for me, and I think I’m just intrigued by the fact that they were always locking horns yet managed to work fairly well together. They obviously had a strong mutual respect for each other too, and I think they both admired each other very much in their own little way. (I also just love the fact that John is the tallest and Terry the smallest). I’d love to read anything that involves lots of good-hearted teasing, especially John winding Terry up just because he enjoys seeing him getting riled. I’d also love them actually being tender with each other, maybe Terry injuring himself somehow (seeing as he was always falling over and jumping over things) and John doing lots of cooing over him. I’m also never ever over the fact that John calls Terry “little plum”. Maybe they just need to get their frustration out on each other SOME way, and THAT way is the ONLY way *shifty eyes*

Fawlty Towers

Basil Fawlty/Sybil Fawlty

Introducing my favourite dysfunctional married couple, Mr and Mrs Fawlty! Honestly, what’s with these two; they argue like cat and mouse but they so obviously love each other very much, and I really don’t think either of them would be able to live without the other. I would happily read something that took place after every single episode of this show. What happens after the Psychiatrists episode, does Sybil ever forgive him for trying to look through that guest's window? How on earth does he make it up to her after the Anniversary episode? How did these two even get together!? Backstory would be amazing. Basil’s a complete and utter sub when it comes to Sybil, so is that what made him fall for her in the first place, the fact that she was ruthless and edgy and a bit mouthy? Are there ever any points where she finds Basil charming or endearing or even handsome!? And if so, what are those moments like? Any kind of exploration into their weird and wonderful relationship would just be great tbh! PS: If you want to go smutty with these two, go for it!

The Thick of It

Adam/Fergus

So I love these guys, they're wonderfully dysfunctional and terribly reliant on each other. Give me anything involving Fergus being an insufferable little bottom and Adam having to take care of him in any which way. Any kind of backstory would be fun - how did Fergus persuade Adam to come work for him? What happens when they try and let off steam? Do they attempt a night out on the pull (“Will you be my wingman?”) but end up going home with each other? Any kind of awkward-ness about feelings would be greatly welcomed, but would prefer a happy ending! And if that involves some mutual hand jobs or a messy shag over the sofa, then so be it!